I started this back in 1997 before blogs – or even many personal web pages – existed. After two years in advertising, and then sans job, I created this timeline of my life as an example of my writing style and suspect creativity. Mainly to supplement my book, which was filled with work for retirement communities, discount funeral homes and Jiffy Lube. I’ve kept it up through the years so that, some day, my kids can look back and learn nothing whatsoever about their dad, other than that he was a bit touched in the head. I have not altered the jokes, such as they are, and most graphics are original so you can tell how the web evolved from over-dithered GIFs to sweet, sweet PNGs. Also, many entries are topical. If confused, do a search for that date and some of the terms. Or simply treat the whole piece like a New Yorker cartoon and assume it’s drolly humorous.